Solid as a Rock

Curtain up! Light the lights!
You got nothing to hit but the heights!
--Everything's Coming Up Roses,
Sondheim and Styne
___________

Heads up, Ranger readers:

Ever at the ready, the FDA has released a warning that Chinese herbal supplements Strong Testis [sic] and Lady Shangai, "marketed for the treatment of erectile dysfunction (ED) and for sexual enhancement," might, um, cause an erection. The products "contain sildenafil, the active ingredient in Viagra, an FDA-approved drug for erectile dysfunction."

The problem is in the labeling. The products are not supplements because "they contain undeclared active ingredients of FDA-approved prescription drugs for erectile dysfunction." Of course, an additional concern arises from the Chinese-sourced ingredients, possibly grown along the cancerous Yangtze or eponymous Yellow Rivers.

What if it turned your member a radioactive orange? Given, once one got past the shock, it might prove valuable navigating dark environs, rather like an aisle attendant's baton at a theater. But who knows if the lights would go down with the curtain?

Dr. Woodcock (you can't make these things up), FDA's chief medical officer, said Strong Testis "put consumers at considerable risk because [it] contains undeclared active ingredients in FDA approved drugs. . ." The FDA urges consumers to report "any adverse events that they feel are related to the use of these products."

I'm not sure I have gotten the hang of this. By "adverse," do they mean, "flaccidity"?